A night of death and dating

Although he had been had been ill for a while with a thyroid problem, until the morning of his death there was no indication that we were also dealing with incurable kidney cancer, nor that before the day was out we would have to say our goodbyes to him and would never see him again.The family member’s name was Dave and he was just shy of his 15th birthday.In a way, I’d been bracing in anticipation of this moment for several years.My father, a physicist, a self-taught artist, a mathematical genius, had suffered from heart problems for the past decade.I spent several long weekends that winter at my parents’ house on Long Island, dragging garbage cans to a dumpster parked in the yard — death has a peculiar way of turning possessions into trash and trash into possessions, and my mother required help distinguishing the one from the other.I called my brother in Massachusetts, encouraging him to finally go back for that elusive graduate degree.So abnormal was his thirst – I’d only ever seen him drink from the water bowl about twice in 15 years – that we took him to the vet immediately.

Such was his docile demeanour that everyone from casual strangers to our cat-sitter and vet adored him. They day before his death he lay on the bed in the spare bedroom, listless, quiet and off his food.

hortly after my father died, I found myself doing a number of things out of obligation.

I organized the funeral in my mother’s stead and gave the opening eulogy, managing, for the benefit of the assembled mourners, only to cry briefly.

Courtship, “may be an informal and private matter between two people or may be a public affair, or a formal arrangement with family approval” and one could argue, it begins with our ancestors reaching blindly for each other on the dirt floor of a cave.

So yes, it has changed a fair bit since then and will continue to do so. I recently made an OKcupid profile which I will now tell you I made in order to research this article and I will be lying.

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